We could be "all in" or "all out" on any topic- social media is great, social media is horrible. But the messy truth is generally somewhere in the complex middle. I work with clients daily who benefit from access to social media and those whose sense of self, life goals, and personal value have been greatly challenged.
What we love about social media:
Quick and Controlled Accessibility
Connecting with people worldwide through their phones or devices can be incredibly fulfilling for autistic individuals. Engaging with humanity's social experience in the most comfortable manner can provide significant benefits. Whether they choose to post, comment, or simply observe the lives of others, this form of connection may feel "just right" for those who find in-person interactions overwhelming.
Shared Interests and Topic Connections
Access to individuals with similar interests and experiences can be immensely valuable. Social media can serve as a lifeline for those with less conventional interests than their local peers. Instead of feeling isolated, they can discover online communities to engage with on their favorite topics. Additionally, autistic individuals often gain support from connecting with other neurodiverse individuals who understand their personal experiences, offer advice, and encourage—something local connections may lack.
Where social media falls short:
Communication with hidden motives --
Some social media posts and comments are deliberately provocative. The writer's sole purpose is to get "engagement" (likes, shares, clicks) by stirring up high emotions (judgment, anger, fear, suspicion). The autistic individual may be more likely to take the posts literally and assume the posters genuinely agree with their postings. They may feel compelled to convince the poster or commenters how wrong they are about such an important topic and feel deeply upset at the injustice of the posts. They may struggle more than the neurotypical to realize the poster's "hidden motives," disengage with the high emotional content, and move on.
Comparison and Self-Esteem Issues --
Similarly, the autistic who follows special interest topics (like parenting, vacations, home decorating, crafting, fashion, or home improvement) may begin to create unrealistic standards for themselves. There may be the underlying literal belief that people's lives "actually are like their social media posts." They may use so much energy trying to keep up with how they see the reality of other people's lives without realizing that "behind-the-scenes lives" are always more complex. There are hidden realities that are messier and more human than a social media post. Sound bites on the media don't literally represent the whole of another person's life.
Time Management and Addiction --
Because social media posts are so short, it can be easy to want to see "just one more clip" before putting down our devices. The autistic who leans toward hyperfocus and "time blindness" may spend hours on social media without realizing they have lost a lot of time and opportunity to make purposeful choices about their day.
Finding Balance
The key to benefiting from social media is finding a balance that works for our good, whether we are autistic or not. Self-awareness of how social media may benefit or harm us is a foundational first step toward making intentional choices. Here are some strategies to enhance the positive aspects while mitigating the negative ones:
Curate Your Feed: Follow accounts that uplift and inspire you while unfollowing those that cause stress or negativity.
Set Boundaries: Establish time limits for social media use and designate specific times for online interactions.
Practice Self-Care: Engage in activities that nourish your mental and emotional well-being, and take breaks from social media regularly.
Conclusion
Social media can be a double-edged sword for autistic adults. It offers opportunities for connection and self-expression while presenting challenges related to communication, overload, and mental health. By understanding these pros and cons, autistic individuals can navigate the digital landscape more effectively, cultivating a positive online experience that enriches their lives and fosters community. With thoughtful engagement and mindful practices, social media can become a valuable tool for connection and advocacy in the neurodiverse community.
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